random

this entry is going to be super random.. don't be shocked, 'kay??

I'm going to join a study tour to Taiwan during the summer holiday..from mid June to mid July..Yesterday was the first meeting.. All of the participator must come..The teacher told us some information.. We must come again nxt week to join the classes.. there are 2 classes, or maybe 3, chinese, singing, and dancing.. i wish we don't need to sing old songs... and I wish the chinese class won't be boring... well, a bit is fine.. but don't be too boring.. haha.. I can't wait for this Taiwan trip..

I just watched Gnomeo and Juliet today..It's definitely funny.. I laughed all the time.. haha.. the music was arranged by Elton John... so good.. :) two thumbs up...

I'm watching Prince and Princess 2 recently.. A taiwanese drama series.. I'm kinda wishing to be a princess 2 too.. lol..

And I'm missing someone.. well, might be not someone only.. but some ones... don't know how to find them...

I always wanna be your little girl

last night,
when I said good night to my mom and dad,
my dad said,
"why don't you grow up?"
and I actually didn't get what my dad said..
then he continued,
"why are you still like a little girl?"
I didn't know what to answer,
so I just smiled..

After I went out from their bedroom,
I told myself,
Because I always wanna be your little girl, dad...

I actually already planned something for my 17th b'day
but, I don't think that I'm gonna tell this to anyone,
except, they're reading my blog.. :)

everyone says 17.. you're now not a little girl/boy anymore..
you've grown up..
yes, we've grown up..
But here, in my heart, I always wanna be your little girl, mom, dad..
will you do this for me???

Aaron said....

well, you might ask, who the hell is Aaron??
He's not my boy *But I wish he was.. lol..*
He's not my brother *and again, I wish he were... :p*
He's the most influenced person in my life...

He got a cute face,
but,
He's been suffering a lot,
I wish I could replace him....

I'm not gonna talk about Aaron this time..
But I'm gonna talk bout what he said..

He said that, Life without friends is like life without the sunshine..
then,
what about life without love??
what I mean love here is love between boyfriend and girlfriend..

I know, friends are more important than a boy/girlfriend.
But, is it wrong wanting a boyfriend/girlfriend??
No, right?? :)

"you're smart"....

A lot of my friends said,
"you're smart!!"
"So lucky to be you..."

what's the benefit of being me??
well, I admit, my score at school is good..
but, Have you ever seen me win a competition which don't have relation with subjects??

I'm just good at subjects..
I don't know what talent that I have..

some of them want to be like me,
have a good score at school and lalala...

hey, don't you think that you guys are more talented than me??
the fact is that, I envy you guys..
you maybe not good at school, but you have skills...
And you can use it..
But I think, not me..
I don't know what talent is mine..

I play piano, but just play.. *you know what i mean*
I draw, but just draw, no art..
I sing, but i just like it, I don't think my voice is special.
*sigh*

a lot of people said
"you're smart"
but nobody's ever said
"you're special"

my feeling

Okay, I don't really know about what exactly I wanted to say..
But I just want to write on my blog..

Here's my feeling recently..
I kinda have a crush on someone...
but I'm quite sure that he don't know me..
well, he might recognize me,
but I don't think he want to know me better,
well, Who am I?
I'm just a eleven grader, a girl who isn't famous in school,
and you can say a School freak..
or, a Bookworm..

well, I admit it..
I like reading, I want to be a nicer girl at school,
not the one who try to be famous at school...

I don't know what to do with my feeling actually..
my first choice, wait until it's my time,
but with his personality,
I don't think it'll work if I didn't do any action..

my 2nd choice, GIVE UP..
and I actually really don't want to do that..
but, if it's the only choice, then I'll do it..
if it's for my own sake, or maybe for his sake, I'll do it..

what's the exact thing I must do??

Tug of war

yesterday, my school arranged 2 competition for celebrating the independence day...
yes, today is the independence day..

I join the Tug of war competition..
actually, I didn't plan to join it coz seems that I'm not chosen.. :p
but then, no one is willing to play, so I just join to have some fun.. :)
in fact, I really had a lot of fun..

1. coz I won... well, my team won...
2. I saw him playing for 8 times.. well, actually he's quite pitiful.. he needed to play 8 times to win,, but I just played 6 times..
   

well, actually, I didn't plan to watch his match, cause I've just done doing mine, and I wanted some cool air.. so I went inside my class.. then, I heard the host said, "This is grade 12 Social 1 VS...."
weew.. It's his class.. Maybe I should watch.. and I saw him standing next to the... well, let's say "rope".. haha, don't know what its name actually.. :D

then his class won the first competition..
after that, I played again for the semifinal, and so did he..
I won, and so did he.. but I just play 2 times, for semifinal, and he needed to play 3 times..
and so was the final.. I played 2 times, but he played 3 times.. :p

well,, you've done well, boy!! you look cute, in fact..


the last one I was really happy is because Rheyhan was there too...
finally, he went to my school... Lol..

Once again,,I'm not ready...

H**l, why the time can't stop?
sometimes we need it to move quicker,
but sometimes we need it to move slower or even stop..
Well, that's Human.. Never feel satisfied...

Why I'm not ready?
okay, here are some reasons...

1. I'm not in the class with my best girl..

2. I've spent the whole holiday (+the 2nd semester final exam) with my sis..
And now, she just left like that.. I'm alone again..
*that's why I wish I had a lil bro or sis*

3. I get more pressure this year..
Because of score, and bla bla bla..

4. I just want to be with her.. is that wrong??

well, i guess that's all..

satisfaction

i know, people never feel satisfied..
but sometimes, we do need to be satisfied for a while..

Paragon.. the newest mall in town..
it's quite far from home,
and I went there just for watching movie??

Hey, I spent a lot of time planning this..
who will pick me up, with whom, and blablabla

then I got there.. bought the tickets, watched the movie..
my first aim CHECKED..
I called my mom and told her the movie's done,
she said that she was picking clothes at the dry clean,
I thought I still have time to buy coffee, or at least snacks..

well, as i know, Indonesian worker are SLOW.. d*mn SLOW..
that's why we need to queue everywhere..
at the locket, at the bakery, and everywhere...

and that's why, I didn't buy anything at last
cause my mom was outside.. ****

i need refreshing, people..
it's not easy to get there,,
and i don't want to went there just for watching A movie..
at least let me walk around for a while!!!
*sigh*

what I want to say

I'm not sure enough about what i'm going to write actually...
so I'm not sure y'all know what or who i'm saying...

First, I would like to say "thank you" for one of my girl...
thanks for buying me "The Last Song" novel with the cover like I imagine...
*I'll pay ofc.. whenever we met after the holiday..*

Second, I would like to say "thank you" *again* to my new "brother"
thanks for accompanying me this holiday..
I hope we can be in the same class next year

Third, I would like to say "thank you" *ironically* to one of my friend..
you've made me such a fool.. really thank you...

Fourth, I can't even wait for 27 of June.. I'll be out of town.. YAY!!!

Fifth, I would like to say "Good luck" for my girl..
Good Luck on your way you've chosen.. :)

I guess that's all..

Happy holiday, Guys!!!!!

hey, girl.. still remember all these??

remember all these, girl??


Totally Spies... Undercover....



Jonas Brothers...


your favorite show, Hannah Montana??



xiao xiao da ren wu?? Fahrenheit??



Lollipop?? Na li Pa?? :)


I hope you still remember those..

I miss you.. :)

I wonder.....

Sometimes I wonder,
What if I weren't born here?
What if I were a Singaporean or Chinese or, even better, American???

well, actually...
I'm bored to live here..

I can't be an independent person..
I need someone to be with me to go anywhere..
No SAFE public transportation,
well, taxi is quite safe.. but the cost......... no thanks.. :p
Bus... mmmm.. don't know how and where to take buses here, except, BRT...
but still, I don't know the route...
and the important one, I'm just a 15-year-old GIRL
walk alone in public means look for death...

huff..
maybe I watched too much movie,
so, I'm wanting their life..
but it's not so possible to live their life here...
is it??

what's the different???

I just received a text from my friend..
he said that he don't need my bio paper,,
he will borrow my other friend..

okay.. at first, i'm quite happy.
why??
cause I don't need to bring that paper to my friend's house..
but I'm quite disappointed..
still, why??
cause What's the different???
it's the same bio paper..
just not the same handwriting,
and not the same owner,
and not the exactly same answer
but the same point..

I might be not the number one in class,
but am I that bad??
until u won't borrow mine??

it's ok if u want to borrow hers,
but do u need to tell me??
do u need to ask me whether mine is done yet???

SO UNIMPORTANT...
just wasted my money!!!!!
don't u get it??
why can't u leave ur bad habit??
wasted the money of friends' cellphone??
first his, and now mine???

jus FYI,
we're tired with you...

lately

okay...
he's here..
but as usual, he won't talk to me 1st..
so i had to talk first..
girl ask boy first????
unbelievable... I'm not gonna do that,...
but at last, I did it.. :(
*I'm so disappointed with me,hope I could be tougher*

this morning, mom said,
"Next month we'll have fam reunion...
it'll be held in auntie's house..
she said that u might play the piano,
but don't play classic song.."
Mom may not ask me to play..
but it seems that she said that to ask me to play..

I'm fine to play the piano..
but I'm not that expert...
what song should I play??

S.O.S by JB??
A little bit longer by Nick J??
Zhi dui ni you gan jue by FLH n Hebe??
Suan tian by FLH n SHE???

dunno.... :(

feel guilty

Ok. I really feel guilty..
It's been 2 days from Sunday..
And I dunno how to fix it...
*hope I could fix it*

He's the one who ever fell in love with her..
And now, I'd ruined everything...
What a nice girl I am???

Now my world isn't the same anymore..
He feels bad, n so do I..
I don't know what her exact feeling,,
but he said that she's happy now..
I don't think so..
cause she's not that kind of girl..
She still have feeling for shouting out loud..
Maybe she's not like me, but in some ways, she's better than me...
Much more better than me.....
Hope he know that...

I really don't know what I must to do...
He's better with her..
but not her...
*sigh*

my memories...

Last day of semester 1 holiday..

And I really bored..

Have nothing to do..

Then got an idea for editing my photo...

Well, thanks God I got photoscape in my grandma’s laptop..

So, I edited some of my pictures with my friends..

It’s one of my memories..

When I edit it, I suddenly feel miss them, especially her..

*can u guess???*

I really can’t cherish the time..

When I was there, I didn’t look for her..

And now, I regret it..

Really-really regret..

When will I be there again??

It’s gonna be take a long waiting...

Not only bored now.. I start to feel scared..

It’s only 2 days more till her leaving..

Well, it’s the 2nd time,

But I still scared..

*I just like a loser*

Well, I have to be braver...

unexpected meeting

well,, first of all, I wanna say Happy new Year...
Wish this year will be better and will give the best for me...

today, 2nd Jan 2010, me and my fam went to dine out..
we had our dinner at a steamboat restaurant..
*we've been there a lot of times.. but we still love it..*
We really enjoy the food, until...
I saw a boy..
and I recognize him..
This is the second time I unexpectedly met him..
First one, was when I still had something with him..

now, everybody told me that he's not the same him anymore..
and I never talked to him anymore..

When I saw him,
all of my memories came to my brain..
huff.. what a very unexpected meeting...

ME...

It's the 1st time I write this blog using my phone..

I miss my friends (especially my bff),my computer, my fb, and my home..

1 thing I'm sure till now and later..
I'm definitely a big fan of Disney..
I bought a lot of disney stuff.. Bag, clothes, books.. And I hope, I'll get more.. :D

Books..
JB's books of course..
The series of camp rock..
*well, I kinda bit disappointed didn't buy the eng ver.. But it's fine.. I'm happy w that*
W these books, I feel like, they're here.. With me.. Sharing their stories..
Accompany me, entertain me...

But what I'm worrying is...
I enjoy my world, which I like, but nobody would share with me..
They do know JB and stuff, but they juz know..
I juz can't share it with them..
Feels like, forcing.. Forcing them to listen to me..
*hufff... Really annoying..and confusing*

I juz can't wait to find somebody who would share those things with me.. who would fine the real me.. N I don't need to be someone else.. I juz hv to be ME...

anything

Well,
after posting the latest posting,
Now I realize that she's really important to me..
N i guess I'm not going out with friends, without her.
*except, I'm going to buy her present*

Tonight,
one o my friend ask "when will u start dating a boy?"
what a silly question is that??
how could he asked me that question??
seems that he already know the answer...
lol

Christmas is on the way already..
really wanted to give him a Christmas present,.,.
but how?? haha.. impossible...

sister...

aneh banget nih perasaan..
Sejak nonton NEW MOON (yg pertama kali),
hubunganku ama dn tu dah baik lagi..
Yaaah, meski jakno bukane ga baik,
tapii, akhir2 ini tu aq ama dn lebih sering jengkel e..
gara" :

1. tmn2 di sekelilingku tdk mendukung kalo dn tu sebenere enak
2. kdg sifat e dn ya emg gitu.. (ga bisa jelasin)
3. emg aq org yg gmpg emosian
4. dari dulu hub Q ama dia ya gitu terus.. (sejak SD)

*sigh*
wew...


dn td blg mbe aq gini "bsk jgn nyarii aq ya.. ada acara..."
cmn ta jawab "ya nek inget.. wkwk..."

Isa ga ya aku pisah dari dia??
selama ini, aku nda sekelas ama dia tu rasae gimana gitu..
ya seneng, tp ya susah..
coz, dia tu enak nek diajak rundingan ttg pelajaran..
tapi, kadang tu sifate jengkeli.. nda tau kenapa..
*yeah, maybe that's coz I really care bout her.. and I hope so*

bingung bgt.. di skul tu jarang ada org yg lebih dewasa drpd aku..
tp dn beda.. meski nyebeli kadang2,,
tapi dn tu kaya lebiih dewasa dr aku.. n I love that feeling..
feels like she's my own sister..

I miss the moments when we're all together..
when we're talking bout our fave books, film, topic..
when we're discussing our lesson..
discussing girl stuff..

I really miss those moments....

long time no see...

long time no see, guyz..
n now,
dunno what to say...

Senior High, huh...
too many homework, test, n school stuff...
so busy...

miss my sis..
miss my best friend..
miss 'him'...

OMG..
my feeling is so complicated...

I should focus on school..
but i want to enjoy my life..
what should I do????